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My New Job Made Me Hate Myself
Everyday that I came home from work I couldn't stop the thoughts running through my head like, "You're going to turn 30, broke and working at ###." or "You're almost 30 and you already failed at your career." or worse, "So what good is your college degree?" Taking this job, this job that I desperately needed left me feeling like the biggest loser ever and I hated that. I wanted to be proud that I was working, that I was figuring out a way to get by, but all I could think about was how it wasn't supposed to be that way.
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“Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” – Why I HATE This Question
Like many people, I currently find myself unemployed and that means it's interview time, again. And with the way the last few years have been, it feels like this has been the season of interviews in my life. From being laid off with only a year left on Oahu, to trying to settle back into life in California, and now COVID, I should be a pro when it comes to interviews and job hunting. In many ways I guess I kind of am. Not to say I'm good at interviews, but very rarely am I surprised by a question or the flow of an interview. I'm so used to hearing…
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2019 Nearly Killed Me – A Look Back on the Year
2019 made me it's bitch and I honestly feel like I'm lucky to be standing. This year tested me physically and emotionally; and looking back I failed myself at every turn. I thought 2018 was a tough year for me, but I made the most of it. I grew. I learned new things. And I started to get better. A lot of good came out of the bad of 2018.
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Summer is here and I’m working on it
As I predicted at the end of my spring post, I am still a mess. In some ways I'm still the same mess and in other ways I am a new mess. I'm still working on many of the same things I was three months ago, but have fixed many of them and made progress on others. I'm still a mess, but as I hoped, I am a slightly happier mess.
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Looking back at 2018
This year has been a crazy roller coaster ride, filled with unexpected ups and downs and, just like a roller coaster, it’s leaving me at pretty much the exact same spot I got on, just a little shaken, beaten and bruised. I don’t regret this roller coaster of a year, it taught me a lot, allowed me to experience so many new things, and, for the most part, changed me for the better. I don’t regret this roller coaster year, but it’s not one I would like to ride ever again. This time last year I had just been laid off from my job of nearly two years. The lay…
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Moving to Oahu
September 25, 2015 I got on a plane in LAX headed for Honolulu. The previous months had consisted of a lot of couch surfing, living with different friends and family, and a two month stay in Utah. I had less than $3,000, an Airbnb studio apartment covered for a month, no job, and pretty much no plan. I had spent my entire life living in California. Despite having graduated from college in May of 2014, I still had not worked a “real” job and with the exception of my adventures in couch surfing, I had never lived on my own. I had never been on a plane and the farthest…